Is everything beautiful in retrospect? I will be honest I have never been so bummed out, I'm so tired like I sleep for days not hours I'm drained. Yesterday I talked to this guy who worked in a clothing store he was my age and was about to be on T.V (they where filming Australia's Next Top Model in store). His only concern was that his ex girlfriend will see it and think he was a loser because he still worked a minimum wage job. I got pretty annoyed at him and had a bit of a go. I too work a horrible job its three nights a week from 11:00 pm till 7:00 am and I do it to pay for canvases, paint, fabric and the occasional plane ticket. But lately its all become to much and I feel guilty because I don't have time to paint, work on the label as much as I would like to or even go catch a band on the weekend. Plus I am drained and just really down I don't know if its the job a season my sleeping pattern or that I can't do the things I love. I keep waiting for it to blow over and a sudden wave of inspiration to hit me by surprise but yeah. I look at this photo and I remember a time when life was well "beautiful" I was my own boss I worked when I was ready, I hardly ever had enough but I always made do things where really good at least that's how I remember them. But I believe feelings are irrelevant I have recently decided not to take on advice but there is two pieces of advice I while hold onto forever and they both came from my oldest sister she said when you make a decision based on emotion and feelings you are more likely to make a mistake and On a good day I'm ok and on a bad day I'm ok. I guess the lesson I'm learning is there is always reason to not put in effort, give up on a dream or walk out of a situation. Life goes on regardless of how I feel.
P.S this is one of my favorite photos I would give my left arm to relive that day.
Nelson
